Monday, April 26, 2010

Culture Shock Is Really Shocking!

The first thing I thought about National Service was that maybe I will don't have any troubles with the culture shock that I'll encountered. But, I was totally wrong.. Indeed, I thought I've prepared my heart the BEST to face the reality of teenagers these days, but... I've failed! My heart dropped to the deepest narrowest blackest hole ever!

I was really taken aback.. I was really sad. The saddest I ever felt in my life until now.. It felt like I don't want to live here, among 'them'.. I want to go back, back to the life I wanted.. I don't want to live in a life that is full of ignorance..AGAIN! This is ENOUGH!

For three straight days, I cried. I cried in my sleep, cried in my shower,cried in my prayer... I cannot stand it.. People looking at me as if I'm a weird creature! What's so weird to wear a long t-shirt, a long scarf..? Haven't you seen one before? Hmmphh..

Is it necessary to mock me, behind my back especially? If you have something disturbing you about me, just ask me! You don't have to keep it to yourself and talk behind my back with others.. That was one of the shameful thing to do!

Why I'm wearing scarf in dorm, why I'm wearing my scarf like that, why I like wearing loose shirt.. Just ask me! I can explain it, if you want to hear..

But, the most disappointing thing I ever felt is, how little the number of muslim girl do the prayer.. It's like..astagfirullah.. My first dorm mates before we got separated according to the Kompeni, really made me cried.. It's like, am I the one who do the prayer? I know I have to think nice, maybe they're having menstruation or something, but! Why all of them? Well, maybe.. Okay2.. I just have to husnuzon... Maybe all of them have it at the same time.. Okay2.. think nice..

Okay, that's the culture shock for me..And, it was really shocking.. (deep sigh...)

5 comments:

  1. Salam alaik...
    pkbr Yong? hopefully sihat...ni on9 dr mna? erm...apapun, kuatkn semangat ye...igt Yong, ini semua ujian. Ujian kita ni kecil sgt2 klu nk dibandingkn dgn ujian yg tpaksa dihadapi oleh baginda Rasul dan para sahabat...kita x pnh lg smpi tahap di baling batu, dilempar najis...igtlah Allah sentiasa bersama2 kita...tersulah menembak doa agar Allah lembutkan hati shbt2 tu, teruskan menembak doa agar Allah cucurkn hidayah kpd mereka...itu tggjwb kita sbg saudara seagama utk mendoakn mereka...ye? jgn sedih2 ye Yong...insyaallah akk doakn yg tbaik utk Yong...akk yakin adik akk ni punya jiwa yg kuat dan tabah...kita kn bkongsi nama yg sama... ^_^ Yong kecil dan Yong besar...!!! La tahzan, innallah ma'ana...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ukhtiku yang disayangi..
    Sesungguhnya seorang muslim itu ,
    apabila berjalan di jalan dakwah,
    ia tidak berjalan dengan hatinya sahaja.
    Bahkan dibawa bersama hati saudaranya.
    Justeru itu, setiap pahala yang didapati sepanjang perjalanannya
    pasti akan terbias untuk saudara seperjuangannya
    -Mustafa masyhur-
    salam rindu..
    tabahkn hati n kuatkan iman

    --Marhamah--

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  3. heheh.. terima kasih kak yong.. alhamdulillah, yong dah try overcome perasaan sedih tu.. yong tetap cuba doa tuk dorg stiap hari.. yong rasa yong sorg je kat situ,sbb tu rasa macam fragile.. tapi,lama2, insyaAllah, yong cuba yang terbaik..

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  4. Mar, terima ksih mar... Mus akan ingat kata2 Mar..insyaAllah..

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sebab ape yong sedih, sebab yong tak ada kawan2 yang nak b'juang bersama kat sana..rasa macam xada sesiapa yang nak bg sokongan..rasa mcm sorang2.. tapi, kalau ade yg solat sama tu,kira cukuplah..dah ok, walaupun xttp aurat sgt..

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Thanks for the comment guys ^^

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